Friday, August 22, 2008

Radiohead and the Day After

Two words come to mind when I think about the White River Amphitheater: NEVER AGAIN.

This post contains both Iphone and Canon pictures. I decided to combine the two days into one as the second day was greatly affected by the first. Honestly I've never had a concert going experience such as this and it's too bad because after I had heard the news of a death in my musical world I really needed some live music to lose myself in.

Getting to the Amphitheater was not too big of an issue. I took highway 18 around so I didn't have to sit in traffic and made it to the show in about an hour and a half. The seats were pretty good and I was lucky to be under cover. There was weather swirling all around the venue and it was raining off and on. A friend that I hadn't seen in years was also in attendance and once we found each other all we did was hug for about 5 minutes saying over and over, "man I've missed you". She is a photographer and a real inspiration. I've known her since she was 14, and she's turning 22 this year.

Before the show I spotted two parents with this adorable little girl. I'm a sucker for kids at shows and when they pulled out the noise canceling ear protection for her I couldn't resist. I asked if it was alright for me to take a picture and they said it was fine. I even e-mailed it to them as they couldn't get her to sit still after I got a couple shots of her, she was so into the music.

"I am a moth who just wants to share your light"

The show began and I tried to lose myself in the music. Unfortunately, it just wasn't there. The energy was off to me. I think the main reason was they played a lot off of In Rainbows, which is very slow and mellow and not my favorite album.

"We're not scaremongering; This is really happening"

I did get to hear a few of my favorite songs: "There There", "National Anthem" which I missed at the Greek Theater show because we were running late, "Idioteque" and the first song that got me into Radiohead thanks to my good friend Casey "Street Spirit (fade out)". Some people don't get Radiohead and I understand that as it took me a while to get into it, but I swear to you the transition from "Exit Music (For A Film)" to "Let Down" on OK Computer is a religious experience. It's beautiful how they bring you down and the in one swift motion bring you back up...all by song.

Even if this show had been the best I'd ever seen in my entire life, it would have been completely negated by the parking situation at the end of the night. I liken it to my emotions to coming off Mt. Si. I was looking for Pinky, it was that bad. My car didn't even move for an hour and a half. I fell asleep, then around 12:30 I was awoken by cars starting up around me. I saw an opening and headed towards the exit. They routed us through country roads, and merged all of the cars together so we wouldn't move for long lengths of time. I did not get home until 3 am. I will never...ever...EVER go to that venue again. Just terrible.

I knew I was going to be out late for the show, of course I didn't know how late, so I took the day off after it to sleep and to also handle a situation that had recently come my way. It's something I've been dealing with for a few years now, and I'm coming to terms with what I have to do about it.

A mixture of guilt and responsibility and not trusting my own instincts are now flooding over me and it's a little too much to deal with. I wanted to head to the mountains with my friend, but had to be responsible so I stayed in the city. I still had my friend with me in spirit and I saw this picture so I had to take it for him.

The tiredness of the day before stayed with me and I went home every couple hours to sleep. The music yesterday didn't bring me out of my funk, so I thought I'd try to do a little shooting. I had an hour to spare so I headed over to Gas Works Park.

Del can head out when he's shooting and you can usually tell his mood based on the pictures. It's cathartic for him, but even dark they still come out beautiful and he's better for it. Mine, on the other hand, reflect the fact that I'm tired, grumpy and not in the best place because they totally suck. I love these arches, but would like to come back when the shadows are longer, and when I'm not pissed off :)

A new AT&T ad maybe?

I debated making this black and white, but I really like the copper color of the old tanks, so I left it as is. It's a terrible shot, but the gloominess of the sky and the ominous look of the pipes captured my mood.

I really like the clouds in this one, and there is a tiny little birdie on the railing.

I'm trying right now to not be mean, to be honest and to know my limits. I don't want to hate anyone and I don't want to hold grudges, but I can't help it in this instance. I'm having a hard time getting over some things from the past and I can't let them go. The one lesson I learned living in LA that I tried to bring with me is that everyone should have a certain place in my life and I shouldn't expect more from them. Each friend I have is special in their own way and they all have their own idiosyncratic things that I am aware of and thus don't expect them to be more than they are. I also need to know when to let people go, no matter how great of a person they are and no matter how much they have taught me. If I can't get over the past it brings both of us down. Ugh.

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